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I was told by the commissioner himself that "if I wanted to stay in the league as a GM that I need to apologize". So here is my rendition:
There are things that I absolutely regret within my actions, mainly thru selfish behaviors. The manner that I displayed my displeasure was surely the wrong way, and stem from other personal reasons non-related to FBB. It was poorly timed by myself, being in a poor emotional state that my "outburst" occurred -- and to that I definitely do apologize. But to provide some context, most if not all of what I said I still do stand by.
Back in the summer I saw vesting interest in the creation of another sim league, and I wanted to ensure it was created in its best way. I wanted CameronCrazy06 to be running the league, because for all the sim leagues that I've been in for the past 9 years he has been the best and most consistent. My goal was to create the foundations for the league (as one of the few admins on the site) and have CC run it, and it definitely worked well to start off the league.
It came to a point where CC was getting overrun with tasks and time, and asked for assistance from myself. Such tasks included doing some sims, creating draft bios lists, updating the waiver wire, etc. The main one that I was interested in performing was the sims itself, because I knew how much of the league wanted (and still do want) LIVE sims. That's how I did the sims in the ADFS Retro league, so it was for the most part no problem at all. I liked doing the sims live, just not the preparation for it. And this here queue's one of my biggest reason for displeasure -- how I was treated. I would come home after a 10+ hour work week and wouldn't even have the time to eat, because I have so many trades and other transactions to process through, followed up by the sim itself. For when I'm waking up at 5am daily, I'm beyond exhausted and hungry at this point, around 9/10p in the evening. After the sim itself, gaining a bunch of league activity that simply does not happen during non-live sims, I post that everyone can claim cash if they attended... except out of nowhere I am personally revoked of claiming any cash. Nobody else isn't allowed to claim, and even though there are two tiers (hitting a post count during the sim gets more than not hitting the count) of claims, I am not allowed to get either. CC can claim cash for my sims, but I can't. Sure, I can claim cash during his live sims and he can't... but he also doesn't choose to do any live sims. I use up my entire bit of downtime after a long day of work and I get penalized for helping out CC when he can't sim himself (I always preferred for him to sim versus myself, it was just to provide assistance). And tbh, I think there are 27 other GMs in this league that had no problem whatsoever with me claiming cash for live sims.
And I wish that was my only gripe, but its not. Every year that the offseason was delayed and people got antsy for the lottery and to make trades, it was almost never a response of "just wait, I'm working on the draft file", but rather "it would have been done had bosox helped at all". And to his credit, I did create the bios list for the first year he asked for (2012) and not for the 2013 or 2014 seasons (he didn't even bother asking for 2015, smart move). But to let you all know, creating that bios list took me about an hour to create. He wasn't asking me for ratings or test sims: just name, height, weight, age, position, and college. I'm not denying that I didn't provide assistance because that would be a lie, but I was not the reason the offseason was delayed.
There are several other things he's ridiculed me or accused me of doing, but you all understand my point. Why would I waste my time putting in effort to maintain the league when I get no thanks at all from the commish himself? I seriously do not believe he's said 'thank you' even once to me, which is sad. I do appreciate those who have supported me (inf, Pugz, RN4L, brack, etc to name a few) but the small minority of support was absolutely mitigated by the lack of support I was receiving from CC, as well as the blame and critique that I did receive from him.
So ultimately yeah I lashed out in a public manner. And while I shouldn't have done it in that way (this post is far more composed and should have been the method), I still don't regret what I said. But its unfortunate though, as due to my checkered past with CC, he has unofficially fired me from the league. I don't want to be kicked out from the league, but if that's the only option left to CC then so be it. I won't be leaving the GroupMe (I tried to tbh, but since I created the group it would be deleted if I did leave), and I'll always be there to talk FBB or non-FBB. And hopefully he has a change of heart and lets me stay. I'm surely planning on still inputting in FA bids tomorrow, because that would be complete bullshit to the next Kings GM (if I'm kicked) lost their 3rd best player because my FA bid was rejected. And hopefully I'll still be a part of the league for this season and more to come... but that's ultimately not my decision.
EDIT: and FWIW I will not be a commish in any capacity, even if I'm allowed to come back. That decision is agreed upon unanimously.
(ps, is this long enough to be an article, or no?)
@[member="Big Bid'Ness"]
There are things that I absolutely regret within my actions, mainly thru selfish behaviors. The manner that I displayed my displeasure was surely the wrong way, and stem from other personal reasons non-related to FBB. It was poorly timed by myself, being in a poor emotional state that my "outburst" occurred -- and to that I definitely do apologize. But to provide some context, most if not all of what I said I still do stand by.
Back in the summer I saw vesting interest in the creation of another sim league, and I wanted to ensure it was created in its best way. I wanted CameronCrazy06 to be running the league, because for all the sim leagues that I've been in for the past 9 years he has been the best and most consistent. My goal was to create the foundations for the league (as one of the few admins on the site) and have CC run it, and it definitely worked well to start off the league.
It came to a point where CC was getting overrun with tasks and time, and asked for assistance from myself. Such tasks included doing some sims, creating draft bios lists, updating the waiver wire, etc. The main one that I was interested in performing was the sims itself, because I knew how much of the league wanted (and still do want) LIVE sims. That's how I did the sims in the ADFS Retro league, so it was for the most part no problem at all. I liked doing the sims live, just not the preparation for it. And this here queue's one of my biggest reason for displeasure -- how I was treated. I would come home after a 10+ hour work week and wouldn't even have the time to eat, because I have so many trades and other transactions to process through, followed up by the sim itself. For when I'm waking up at 5am daily, I'm beyond exhausted and hungry at this point, around 9/10p in the evening. After the sim itself, gaining a bunch of league activity that simply does not happen during non-live sims, I post that everyone can claim cash if they attended... except out of nowhere I am personally revoked of claiming any cash. Nobody else isn't allowed to claim, and even though there are two tiers (hitting a post count during the sim gets more than not hitting the count) of claims, I am not allowed to get either. CC can claim cash for my sims, but I can't. Sure, I can claim cash during his live sims and he can't... but he also doesn't choose to do any live sims. I use up my entire bit of downtime after a long day of work and I get penalized for helping out CC when he can't sim himself (I always preferred for him to sim versus myself, it was just to provide assistance). And tbh, I think there are 27 other GMs in this league that had no problem whatsoever with me claiming cash for live sims.
And I wish that was my only gripe, but its not. Every year that the offseason was delayed and people got antsy for the lottery and to make trades, it was almost never a response of "just wait, I'm working on the draft file", but rather "it would have been done had bosox helped at all". And to his credit, I did create the bios list for the first year he asked for (2012) and not for the 2013 or 2014 seasons (he didn't even bother asking for 2015, smart move). But to let you all know, creating that bios list took me about an hour to create. He wasn't asking me for ratings or test sims: just name, height, weight, age, position, and college. I'm not denying that I didn't provide assistance because that would be a lie, but I was not the reason the offseason was delayed.
There are several other things he's ridiculed me or accused me of doing, but you all understand my point. Why would I waste my time putting in effort to maintain the league when I get no thanks at all from the commish himself? I seriously do not believe he's said 'thank you' even once to me, which is sad. I do appreciate those who have supported me (inf, Pugz, RN4L, brack, etc to name a few) but the small minority of support was absolutely mitigated by the lack of support I was receiving from CC, as well as the blame and critique that I did receive from him.
So ultimately yeah I lashed out in a public manner. And while I shouldn't have done it in that way (this post is far more composed and should have been the method), I still don't regret what I said. But its unfortunate though, as due to my checkered past with CC, he has unofficially fired me from the league. I don't want to be kicked out from the league, but if that's the only option left to CC then so be it. I won't be leaving the GroupMe (I tried to tbh, but since I created the group it would be deleted if I did leave), and I'll always be there to talk FBB or non-FBB. And hopefully he has a change of heart and lets me stay. I'm surely planning on still inputting in FA bids tomorrow, because that would be complete bullshit to the next Kings GM (if I'm kicked) lost their 3rd best player because my FA bid was rejected. And hopefully I'll still be a part of the league for this season and more to come... but that's ultimately not my decision.
EDIT: and FWIW I will not be a commish in any capacity, even if I'm allowed to come back. That decision is agreed upon unanimously.
(ps, is this long enough to be an article, or no?)
